March 9, 2005

Grab-bag and a Hench story by Request

I’ve been buried under 3 miles of pesky “work” the last week or two, so I haven’t been available to keep my electronic friends posted on my incredibly mundane hijinks. Though, as I type this and am IM’ing with Leslie, the lady hath declared I make this one funny…so the pressure’s on.

So with that, let me share the thing that made me laugh so hard I cried today. I was reading the recaplet from the other night’s American Idol on TwoP, and in it, the recapper started his summation of (fucking) Constantine with “Fucking Constantine frogging his lips out”. It’s just the perfect imagery for a perfect douche.

Okay, so Leslie has requested a classic Hench story. I’ma admit right here, I don’t have many “zany” Hench stories, as acting the fool was usually my job, she was just there to supervise…sooooooo. Let us drift back to the Spring of 1998…there was a frat party at that duplex all the way down the end of 42nd by Powhatan on the ODU side, and as per usual, the Hench was my chaueffer/chaperone/apologist. For some cockamamie reason we were not allowed to use the bathroom at said party, and for probably an even more cockamamie reason, I decided that I needed to ride in the back of Hench’s two-door car on the way back from a bathroom run. So we’re back at the party, and time to de-car, but I was not very successful. My legs got all caught up in the seatbelt, and I straight up fell out of the car. Hench was pre-occupied with something (more than likely Baxter) when she turned to say, “WHAT are you doing?” She said I matter-of-factly said “I’m getting out of the car. Help me.” As I was holding myself up on two hands, legs still trapped somewhere in the back of the piece (car).
I told you. No super-crazy Hench stories, just the sad truth that Hench can be one stone-cold mother and I am a total buffoon (no surprise there).

4 comments:

Leslie said...

Thank you I needed to laugh, that will suffice. What kinda car did Hench drive again? I can picture something awry with the door, but memory is failing.
I feel the same way about T. I am always playing the oft times cry baby to her mom figure. Is this they way best friends are made? One confused listless character paired with one with a plan? If this sounds familiar CA it is because I just IM'd you. I realized as of late that IM is destroying your well wrought comments.

Carol Ann said...

Lest you think Hench is a bastion of composure and decorum, I dare you cast one drop of water on any part of either of her socks. She will go, as we used to say in the carpet business, Apeshit. Rainy days + Hench walking around campus= reign of terror.

As for the car, I can't remember what kind. This would be a good time for our other electronic friend to chime in. WELL??

Hench said...

I had misplaced that one somewhere in my brain! Oh yes, that was a good one. That was when I had the piece I think because remember it was two door so you were having to try to keep the seat pushed up and step OVER the seatbelt to get out- a challenge even for a perfectly sober person. Ah man. Thanks for the laugh!

Hench said...

Oh yeah, I guess you knew it was the piece. That car was a 1983-or-84-or-85 Dodge Charger. I wish I had a picture I could post. I loved that car. Except for the no air conditioner part. That was not a fun summer, driving back and forth to U Rasta at the beach in 90 degree weather everyday. Super.

And, by the way, I still hate wet socks. I guess I always will. I am sorry you had to see me lose my composure, but you just can't be dignified with wet socks!