I slept probably only two hours last night. My sinuses were completely blocked and when I say completely, I MEAN completely. I was five seconds away last night from giving myself a tracheotomy in order to get a few minutes of sleep. In an exercise of futility, I turned the cell phone off only to realize if someone wants to speak to you bad enough. They WILL get through, even if it means calling your roommate and waking her up from a dead sleep. At times, I would look at the T.V. to see what random show was flashing. At about 3 some movie came on called “May” which is probably one of the worst films I’ve ever seen. The girl murders her friends (if you can call them that) in order to stitch together a human doll. From now on the sleep timer is going to be on because if I’m not going to sleep, I’m sure as heck not going to be thinking about human dolls, ick! The Ring was on last week and I was afraid to venture out into the hallway, worried that Samara would be waiting me on the steps. (*am such a chicken)
Today I am gliding about work in a Vicks induced dream-like state. My voice has been reduced to a whisper, so my responses come out inappropriately (and unwanted) seductive and then move into a toad-like croak. Something like: “Art Department..thisss isss Lessslie…sigh…..4 trillion coupons…my plezure…..cough cough, cough, hack, cough.”
So I venture into the ladies room for some tissue. I must say, “Ladies please lay off the air freshener!” Air freshener is a cover-up device when used normally, but in large portions it can be an air stealing weapon of death and destruction. There was literally a gagging cloud of apple cinnamon goodness hovering in one of the stalls last week.
I decided to eat lunch early at my desk and shut my door. Shutting your door apparently does not mean “privacy” as I had erroneously thought. It really means knock more vigorously and then proceed to edge your way in as I mumble that I’m eating.
Yesterday there was an inch of snow on the ground that caused total pandemonium in Norfolk. See here’s the thing, the squall attacked at 3:30. Most of the local job places were letting off first shifters and opening their doors to the night crew. School buses were already on the road and when the snow stuck it melted and then refroze into sheets of ice. I wish I coulda taped “The Points” traffic report. The sky-lady was like, “Norfolk is a total gridlock, there are too many accidents to report. Long story-short, it took me 3 hours to get to my house, which on a normal day is only 15 min away. Looking on the bright side, my car is fine despite a few scary skids - and I am fine, if only for the next 30 minutes or so.
3 comments:
Man, you need to lock your door when eating lunch at your desk. I lock the door and put my phone on "Do Not Disturb", which will shun would-be callers with a busy signal. If they knock, I pretend not to hear, even if they whimper.
Fumigating the restroom with air freshener totally defeats it's own purpose. No one likes the chemically-based rendition of the scent of apple cinnamon crisp THAT much...And spraying so much that my eyes tear up only points out that you dropped a big messy bomb moreover. Listen office dwellers, if you can't handle people knowing that you made a doody, then go to the Krispy Kreme down the street! They play music at an ungodly volume for no apparent reason in their bathrooms, plus there's NEVER anyone in there.
Try four hours using all the ghetto backways. At the last hour I decided to eat some sushi buffet. I figured I at least deserve some raw fish after that. ^_^
* sigh...no Sushi, but I did reward myself with Taco-Fest 2005. Yummy, apparently the reward for sitting in traffic for large periods of time is gluttony on a massive level..LOL
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