November 13, 2005







I've totally been electronically dissing, huh? I started a part-time/holiday-time job at Pier 1 last week, and I've been hard at work building the perfect Access database at for my real job; which I may not even get to use because I have JURY DUTY this week. Boo. So yeah, that's where I've been.

I don't have too many thoughts about my re-entrance into the world of retail, if you can call my time served in the beach shop at the waterpark as retail. Cause like, the candle section alone at Pier 1 is bigger than the whole damn beach shop. But, one interesting side-effect of my first week at P1 is that I have a newfound appreciation for my real job at the radio station. I have an office where I can more-or-less control the temperature, choose my own music (and not play one CD of really lame covers of actually good songs on loop), and a closeable door to tell the world to fuck right off whenever I want. Oh yes, and a cushy chair to sit in. Despite all the cushy chairs sprinkled throughout the P1, sitting in any of them while on duty is frowned upon. Double boo.

I've also discovered my inner class/workforcism. It dawned on me this week that people choose to work in retail. Like, as their job job. Whenever I'm at the mall, or even P1, I assume that the people working there are only working part time because they're in school, or are married and just working for pin money. And whenever they give me guff, I always attribute their crappy customer service to the fact that this isn't their bread and butter so they don't care. But there really are people who take retail seriously. The other night it was getting late at the P1, and a shift manager (I think, I haven't quite nailed down the P1 org chart just yet) was going for some kind of re-stocking record, wheeling out a jam-packed cart of crap to re-shelve when we normally are starting to clean up and prepare to close. So we were trying to get everything out on the floor as fast as possible to get to leave faster; and when I hesitated for a second when thinking about where a certain craptacular christmas-themed votive holder went, the shift manager said, with a straight face, "Oh, I believe those go up front in the jingle-bell statement." Jingle bell statement! I guess every industry and/or business has it's own gay little terms & lingo. Just typing this entry reminded me of a radio term; "P1", which refers to your most loyal listeners.

Maybe the reason I haven't succeeded in any field, be it professional or retail is because I can't speak the secret language without chuckling? Oh well, in the meantime, you're all getting crap from Pier 1 for christmas, so whip out your catalouges and consider what kind of statements you'd like to open this year.

Also, I'm totally referring to everything as a statement from now on. If Dieter from Laguna Beach can refer things that in no way could ever be considered "standard" as "standard", then I can just slap "statement" on the end of just about anything.

As my closing statement, I have rambled on enough.

6 comments:

Leslie said...

OEF is eating humble pie this week. Me with no computer and you with your Pier One Life less interesting "statement".

Hench said...

And I can't figure out why my computer at home won't show any posts after October 27th. I think that technology is tryin to tell us something...maybe that we should hang out, together, in person? Hmmm....

Leslie said...

Seriously. I haven't seen you since May 02 Graduation Henchio.

Hench said...

For real, let's have that reunion that fell through last spring...maybe in Norfolk, since G and I can stay with our families fo free!

Carol Ann said...

I second that motion, Commissioner Hench. Maybe after the new year? A summit it is!

Hench said...

Uh...yeah...so all I had to do was hit the refresh button and now the latest post shows up.....I had it bookmarked so I guess somehow it got stuck on the 27th of October...whatever, I don't know. I'm a loser.