Goodbye Robert

"Design is, literally, purposeful planning. Graphic Design, then, is the form those plans will take."

Shei gave me "The Cheese Monkeys" for Christmas the first year after we graduated college. It's been one of my favorite books, not just because it reminded me of my experience as a graphic arts student but mainly because it reminded me of my favorite acerbic professor Robert.

He passed away suddenly yesterday. To say he was an influence on me and my class would be an understatement. After having several different types of free-spirited hippy art teachers (nothing wrong with those!), his no nonsense, realities of graphic design approach was frustrating at times; but has been endlessly helpful in swimming the viscous rivers of G.D. jobs that me and several of my classmates ('02) have faced since leaving the Visual Arts Building.

I wanted to share some things I imparted from him - these aren't direct quotes, but it's how I hear them when I'm working.



Robertisms (as I apply them to life day-to-day activities)

• Creativity is OVER-RATED. Take something someone else did and BUILD FROM IT.
• What is THE message?
• Find the "Rules".
• Never use more than two fonts.
• If you use treefrog font, I will fail you. It makes my eyes bleed.
• Avoid using filters. They do not make an already bad design better.
• Don't use screen fonts for print work.
• This is an "A" work. This is a "C". What is the difference here?
• "RIP" (sound made by our last-minute projects peeled off the board)
• No music lyrics or CD covers. You will most likely fund your existence typesetting or making ads.
• Why are you married to this project? Finish it and move ON.

These are just a sampling of the things he left with me, with US.
Us - meaning my classmates, which I'm happy to call colleagues AND friends - 10 years strong.

I'll close with another quote from Professor Sorbeck in the Cheese Monkeys --

"A bazillion years ago, some poor son of a bitch Cro-Magnon scratched a drawing of a buffalo onto the wall of his cave. He didn't do it because his muse had called to him, or to explore the texture of bauxite, or to start the neoprimitive-expressionist movement. He did it because he killed a goddamn buffalo and he wanted someone else to know about it, after he was gone. He had a specific, definable purpose for making a piece of visual information. The first one."

THANK YOU ROBERT - for leaving us a with definable purpose. A first one.

With eternal gratitude - Leslie P. - Class of 2002.

Harborfest 2009

One of my favorite events in Norfolk every year is Harborfest. If for no other reason than I get to eat weird things and roam around Town Point park. This year it was on the 4th vs. it's normal June summer kickoff. Good because the fireworks were great, bad if you were trapped in a local parking garage for 2 hours post holiday festivus.

The city is noisy? Wha?? That is unbelievable!

Why is it that every time I'm watching House Hunters on HGTV (or similar shows) where the people are looking for condos in the city, they always say "Well, its kind of loud." "Well, I'm not sure about all the traffic noise.." WTF? Move to the damn suburbs then. I'm sick of these people.

Rant over.

31 by 31's end List

This idea originated with my friend "A" at a happy hour discussion last year prior to my 30th B-Day. Her and her friends were forming lists of things they wanted to have done by 30. I was already about 7 weeks from the digits in question, so I figured there was no way to squeeze in 10 years worth of things I should've already done in my 20's into 40 odd days. The idea however ruminated around my brain and I made a list (last summer).

Last night at a separate happy hour (nearly a year later to the first conversation). "The list" came up again. My friend J mentioned a bar which featured a mechanical bull, one of the things on my list. Then we chatted on about how sharing the list might help me get to do some of these things (through the magic power of "REAL" social networking.)

I have til 32 to get these things done. I'm going to italicize the ones I've already done.

So friends..here is my list, help me if you can/want to:
1. Ride Motorcycle (preferably drive one, but baby steps...)
2. Ride Mechanical Bull
3. Get a Tattoo
4. Increase income substantially.
5. Restore outdoor garden!! (poor flowers! I failed thee)
6. 31 Brand New Drawings
7. Post my website.
8. See the Grand Canyon (Larry!!)
9. See Chicago
10. Bling Team Field Trip
11. Conquer Gryffon at Busch Gardens.
12. Take some friggin classes!
13. See Barack Obama speak (live)
14. Go Camping and Tubing!
15. Cook something difficult (lamb?)
16. Read Twilight Series (for fun).
17. Take mom to Red Lobster as a surprise (must be a surprise!!)
18. HOST a party.
19. Bloc Party AGAIN
20. Learn a real dance - something fancy.
21. Get paid for a freelance.
22. Cancel useless bills.
23. Professional Sports Game (any sport, whichever one avails itself)
24. Run a marathon (Rock'n Roll is looking good).
25. Fix a broken friendship.
26. Complete the big family book.
27. Dive! (versus ungraceful cannonball flops)
28. Hiking
29. Comiccon!
30. Paintball
31 & 32 are "personal". Sorry team I have to do those on my own. ;)

The only real rules for your own lists..is that you must try to do this while you still can..it's NOT a bucket list and that it must be "fun" light ideas..Nothing major major goal oriented.

Medieval Fax

After watching one of the analysts stand by our (at least) ten year old fax machine for 20-30 minutes cursing and pleading with it to work; it occurred to me that people within the building order themselves pretty much whatever they want. By whatever, I mean WHATEVER: Ergonomic keyboards, fancy purple scissors, brand new chairs, even cubicle ambiance lighting. So why hasn't anyone ordered a new fax machine? And why do we only have one if it's being used constantly?

I would propose it, but ideas are usually rewarded with more work. Instead, I'll just continue to watch coworkers flounder by the fax machine.

VB AMP - MORE Mental Notes and Queries

I went to the No Doubt show last night out in VB. I won't recap the concert - except to say I had a great time! But I made some mental notes on how to improve my trials at outdoor music events and I thought I'd share. Friends feel free to bust me on these if you catch me repeat offending.

Querie 1:
Concerts at the VB Amphitheater are in the spring and summer seasons, which therefore means it's HOT. While black is the "it" color of alterna-rock enthusiasts (usually checking out the NorVA), it is a color which collects heat and generally makes for a miserable outdoors experience.

Querie 2:
If sitting on the lawn and you are a girl, it's probably best not to wear any foot apparel featuring a heel. You will just sink into the grass. Yes, cute is important - but you can't jump up and down with your feet sunk three inches into the ground.

Querie 3:
If your hair reaches below your ears, just ponytail that sh*zz. Or else you will be leave looking like a disheveled disco lion. It's hot, sweaty, and humid and no amount of John Frieda or clever hat usage can calm the follicle beast.

Addendum to Querie 3 - Since you will indeed leave looking like a disco lion anyways; and makeup, heels, and hair are of little to no significance in a sauna, tt is probably best not to carry a purse filled with make-up and hair aids.

Querie 4:
This is another for lawn patrons, unless you have come to make out for 2 hours or are under 12 you are probably not going to sit on your blanket, low sitting chair, or bobo towel. You are going to stand and dance and sing..and if you are not, the person in front of you is definitely going to. So just don't bring it. Why be seated to look at the person in front's butt for hours on end?
Just buy yourself a seated ticket with the money you were going to spend on the chair/chair rental.

And finally, if you are at this concert - don't continuously recap how awesome ANOTHER concert was. That was then, and this ..this is right now.

oh pony....

I would like to thank Carol Ann for introducing us all to cakewrecks. But today, I'd like to thank my good friend Shei from VB for keeping up with CW and finding this gem.

Our "pony" has been commemorated in cake form.

Who's to Blame?

So through some weird process or another, I was alerted to the fact that someone I know (and is possibly/absolutely related to me) was "tagged" in some recent prom photos. What I found while perusing said pictures was kind of disturbing. I'm no fashion plate, admittedly quite the opposite (as evidenced by my ever-slouching dress socks). But Christ on a Cracker are these some hideous prom dresses. Every single one of them!

Checklist

Mom's coming to spend the rest of the week with (me) the beach. I cleaned the nooks and crannies of the stove and the area between the fridge and the wall. I washed everything that could be shrunk, bleached, or fed to my malevolent dryer. I mowed my square of grass in the backyard and attempted to pull as many weeds out of the flower garden as humanly possible. I left the coffee pot out with the coffee nearby so she wouldn't have to rummage, and sticky noted her very own personal box of Cheez-its.

I shoved every late bill into a shoebox into the far nether regions of my closet and attempted to clean out my car.

Is there anything I'm forgetting?

Money

It's funny how having several one dollar bills in your purse/pockets makes you feel like you have lots of money, but really it's only like eight dollars.